Bernd Leno
No Schmeichel? No Seaman? Even if we succumb to recency bias, it will surprise many that Alisson is not in nets, arguably the best top-flight keeper in the modern era.
To explain their omissions we must acknowledge the key attribute needed for this discipline of football, which is of course shot-stopping. Distribution is a plus, as too is sweeper-keepering, but ultimately agility is all.
No doubt the greats from previous decades were pretty handy on this front, but if we lean into stats – statistics that have only been used in recent times – then Leno is head and shoulders the finest shot-stopper, and by some distance.
Last season the Fulham custodian saved 38 out of 54 one-on-ones he faced. That’s outrageous.
Virgil Van Dijk
Rio Ferdinand just misses out here to a towering Dutchman who – like the former Manchester United legend – is an archetypal modern defender but who, crucially, also possesses a plethora of old-school attributes.
Van Dijk is a brute, blessed with a presence that makes him appear ten foot tall. That will come in handy in a back-line that consists of precisely one.
Additionally, his swiftness of thought matches his ability to cover ground quickly, not that he needs to put in the miles. There is not a centre-back around better at anticipating danger and positioning himself to negate it at source.
There are several reasons why Liverpool are mainstays these days near the top of the Premier League winner betting odds. One of them is Virgil van Dijk.
David Silva
We’ve all bore witness to a hopelessly one-sided five-a-side game, where the disparity largely derives from a player being present who once had a trial at Crewe.
The player in question barely breaks sweat, the ball seemingly finding him magnetically, as he slide-rules pass after pass to the feet of his forwards.
Come the final whistle the poor opposition are befuddled and shattered. They couldn’t get near him despite the fact that he barely moved five yards.
All of the above mirrors the fabulous career of David Silva, only with the little magician his magisterial superiority was at the expense of elite footballers, some in their own right fairly decent.
He’d be a joy to watch in trainers.
Eric Cantona
And the same very much goes for Cantona, a player who exhibited street-fare amidst the highly-pressurised environs of Old Trafford and beyond.
The Gallic genius bestrode the game with an arrogance that was wholly backed up by rare talent, one that inspired Manchester United to numerous league titles along with a brace of FA Cups.
Cantona was the great conductor, his flicks and tricks always calculated to get the best out of his team-mates. There was always real purpose to his artistry.
Moreover, as a long-standing aficionado of beach football, he’d be well up for accepting our invitation.
Thierry Henry
From his searing pace, to his astonishing prolificacy, Henry would terrify whichever unfortunate sap was entrusted to shackle him.
Indeed, the three-time winner of the Golden Boot would run riot, feasting on the silver service provided by Silva and Cantona, and burying shot after shot into the far corner.
Still in great shape at the age of 46, you suspect Arsenal’s Premier League odds would shorten were he to come out of retirement and return to the Emirates.
Just imagine him in this environment. The French ace would be nigh-on unstoppable.
*Credit for all of the photos in this article belongs to Alamy*
