Here’s an opinion that resides on safe ground. Had Toni Kroos played for an English top-flight side at any stage during his illustrious career, he would now be considered one of the best Premier League midfielders of all time.
There would have been no period of acclimatisation required, the German typically dictating the rhythm of any game he plays in rather than having it dictated to him.
There would have been no season or two of struggle because failing at football was, and is, an alien concept to him.
With a commendable work ethic melded to peerless technique, and the wondrous ability to do his rare vision full justice with both feet, Kroos would have shone at Chelsea, or minimised Manchester United’s decline post-Ferguson.
He would have been a joy and a privilege to watch in the flesh.
Alas, the television has always had to suffice, tuning in regularly to La Liga, not to follow Real Madrid’s fortunes – with little skin in the game it always felt obligatory to want the behemoth to lose but not especially so – but rather to enjoy a weekly midfield masterclass.
For nine years at the Bernabeu, after seven highly successful seasons with Bayern Munich, Kroos has found team-mates with laser accuracy, ticked things over, schemed and probed the most stubborn of defences, and generally been brilliant in every department and though there isn’t an exact metric to use, it’s fair to say he has played a considerable role in Los Blancos winning three league titles and four Champions Leagues in recent times.
There is also the not-so-small matter of three titles and a Champions League triumph with Bayern too.
Born in Greifswald, East Germany, just 56 days after the Berlin Wall came crashing down, Kroos first rose to prominence when captaining his country at the Under-17 World Cup, taking home the Golden Ball as the tournament’s best player.
A steady progression through the Bayern ranks included a loan spell with Bayer Leverkusen and inevitably international recognition followed, one of the finest players of his generation retiring in 2021 on 106 caps.
And from that multitude of appearances, one stands out sharp in the memory, that being Germany’s ridiculous seven-goal demolition of Brazil at the 2014 World Cup that made such a mockery of the sports betting.
Kroos was equally as ridiculous that memorable evening, scoring twice and assisting for good measure. He picked up the Man of the Match merit and was thereafter christened ‘Garcom’ (‘waiter’) by the shell-shocked South Americans. He served up pass after pass.
As he’s done at Real for seemingly an eternity, his metronomic distribution timeless, but of course there is infinitely more to his game than merely laying the ball off to a man in space.
Kroos’ free-kicks are a thing of beauty, arcing, dipping howitzers that blend style with accuracy and, on occasion, raw power. His assists are laced with an imagination few possess.
Should his team be up against it, this is also a sterling talent with the willingness to roll up his sleeves and muck in.
Not for nothing did Johan Cruyff once describe Kroos as ‘almost perfect’ and lest we forget, the Dutch deity only ever considered one man – himself – capable of perfection without caveats.
It is a genuine shame that we never got to see this almost perfect maestro perform his magic on English fields. But we’ll always have the telly. We’ll always have the memories.
*Credit for all of the photos in this article belongs to Alamy*
